Madai's October Blog

Well its just over a year since I came to live in Church Minshull and Autumn is here again. Something has been knocking down maize in my field, and eating the cobs, but on the plus side they have been leaving good smells for me to sniff and chase. My man person says it will be badgers and that the maize will be cut soon; that means I'll be able to help clean the field as well so more power to my tummy! Last year I was still quite nervous and hesitant so didn't understand all my responsibilities but now I'm much more adventurous. When I came here I was a bit "thick in the middle" as you can see!

With good food and plenty of field patrols I'm a much better shape now. Longer, leaner, fitter and weighing almost the same and all muscle. My man tried to put me on the scales but I wasn't going to have anything to do with killer-grams! Plus I made sure he got plenty of my special dog slobber on his clean shirt to stick down those pesky black hairs I'd just been sharing with him as he had to lift me onto the scales!

Following the Keats title, and because I'm a great fruit eater (well anything really because I'm ALL LABRADOR) I wanted to share some of my hard learned foraging tips with you:

• Fallen fruit needs picking up and dropping first to shake out the wasps — don't ask me how I know!
• Go easy on the fruit diet before bedtime otherwise your people are in for a disturbed night or some serious mop and bucket action in the morning
• Sloes are badly named, they should be called Dries because that's what your mouth feels like and drinking too much pond water has other effects
• Rosehips are a mistake as they are very prickly
• Brambles are easy pickings once you've learnt to peel your lips back plus the fruit stains don't show on my black coat, otherwise see rosehip instructions
• Hawthorn berries — see rosehips
• Damsons have little goodness, are stoney on the way down and on the way out
• Raspberries are delicious though the pips get in your teeth
• Gooseberries should be avoided at all costs: I didn't understand why my man was wearing thick leather gloves when cutting them, but I do now!

Anyway last month I put a "pun prize" in the blog. Congratulations to the reader who spotted it — "querky" being a play on "Quercus" the scientific name for Oak trees. They are now the proud owner of a bag of shortbread Scottie dogs. This month, which tree is a real fag, if you live under it? Answers by email to madaithelabrador@gmail.com

Madai — your rovering reporter

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